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3 Tips To Take Charge of Your Self-Love & Reclaim Your Happiness

Writer's picture: Shana AugusteShana Auguste

Updated: Jan 24



 

The term self-love and self-care is used everywhere we turn in society today. The wellness industry is saturated with experts giving us advice based on the research pre and post pandemic. While this is undoubtedly helpful when applied strategically, sometimes we need to have things presented in a simple package without all the fancy wrapping paper & elegant bows.


Loving yourself is the best gift you can give to yourself. It is a gift that keeps on giving. What do I mean by that? Well, loving yourself truly and authentically can transform your life in ways you may not even be intending to. Your focus becomes yourself and the unique relationship you are rebuilding, but how you care and show up for yourself has impact far beyond just you!


1. Make Space for Yourself Unapologetically


This does require of level of self(ish)ness that is not self-centered but rather you centering within yourself. Does that feel icky? It's ok, breaking old habits is never easy and usually we experience a level of discomfort initially. You deserve to be the star of your own show, not a supporting cast member.


It will take some implementation of new boundaries and standing firm like you may never have before. It will make other people uncomfortable if they are use to having unlimited access to you and getting what they need from you without objection. I promise you they will be ok, their lives will go on, and they will figure things out without your involvement.


You have to make the decision that you will focus on your healing, your self-care, your needs, and your desires without the permission or interference of others. I know that's hard, but it's necessary for your elevation into the newest version of yourself. You deserve to love yourself guilt free.


2. Discover What Brings You Joy


What is it that you love? You may have been focused on the needs of your family, friends, or employer for so long that you forgot what really moves your spirit. Can you imagine your life where you make dedicated space on a regular basis for your passions? Do you see the true joy and bliss those engagements give you?


I ask these question because you need to envision doing these things to recieve a visceral response. If you were able to imagine that joy, what were you doing that gave you that joy? Where were you? Find what you love outside of your obligations, responsibilities, & commitments. What do you love just because of the pure bliss you feel from it?


As a recovering people pleaser I have always received great joy and satisfaction from helping others and making them happy. Though I do love being in service of others, I had to find and commit to doing activities that bring me satisfaction outside of my attachments to others. My joy is no longer based on the validation and approval of others but solely on my sensory perception of the habits and standards I set for myself.


To help you discover this, try reflecting on what gave you joy in your childhood. Harness that love, energy, passion and apply it to your life now. Maybe you really loved playing kickball or painting, whatever that thing(s) was try to find the adult version of that activity. Remember the passion and fulfillment you experienced as a child and find that love again. Be sure that what you choose is driven by your interests rather than lead by the influence of others.


3. Forgive Yourself & Give Yourself Permission


Sometimes we need to give ourselves permission to forgive ourselves. We all have a things we wish we could change. Some of those things we may never have the ability to change, but we can always make the choice to let go of the pain, resentment, or judgement. Our lack of forgiveness is like carrying extra unnecessary baggage on a plane. And in 2023 you have to pay for extra baggage on each trip.


This same concept is applied to our lives. All of our current and future engagements suffer when we don't release ourselves from the clutches of our past mistakes or poor decisions. We are so riddled with guilt that our minds are stuck in the past preventing our ability to experience the beauty of what is in front of us. What a disservice we do to ourselves when we decide healing our wounds is not a priority.


Forgiveness is healing and giving yourself the permission to move forward allows you to walk into a new season of your life with fresh energy. You can only control your actions and if you take the lessons from your past experiences and use it to make better informed choices, you can let go of the rest. It's ok to move forward with love and appreciation for your former self while embracing a version of yourself from your dreams into your reality!


Now, why are these 3 tips important? Well, when applied in truth and honesty with the self, you increase your overall happiness which adds fuel to your energy tank. You become more productive in all areas of your life. You serve those around much better because you are now in a state of flow; giving from a full tank rather than a tank nearing empty. Caring for yourself has a ripple effect that is beneficial to you and everyone in your energy field. Remember we repeat what we don't repair, prioritize yourself today and let the old you go so the new you can grow!


With LUV,


LUV Spreadah

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©2025 by Shana Auguste of Just LUV. All Rights Reserved. 
All material contained within this website is written by and is the copyright of Shana Auguste and may not be reproduced in any manner without the express written permission of the author.

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